Social Thoughts: On Panhandling

I tote a bag of apples in my car. Whenever I see someone panhandling, I offer them one.

Jack London:

A bone to the dog is not charity. Charity is the bone shared with the dog, when you’re just as hungry as the dog.

If you live or work near any urban area, you’ve encountered folks on the street. Dealing with those asking for or simply needing help is a tricky enterprise. When I was a teenager, I had an experience that shook me to the core.

It was late on Friday night; I had been out partying with my friends. We approached a diner entrance looking to settle down with some eggs and pancakes when we witnessed what looked like a man severely down on his luck. Clothes tattered, he wore a sad countenance and lethargic body language. I labeled him immediately in my mind as homeless.

With some empathy (or, more likely, a guilty conscience), I headed inside the restaurant. My friends and I dug into our late night feast. Our booth had a view of the man outside and, about halfway through the meal, a truck of kids drove by and threw water on him.

My men and I were appalled. We all chipped in, purchased the man a meal and presented it to him on our way out. An hour or so later, after dropping some people off, I witnessed the exact same scenario unfold. Same guy, same group of kids in the truck, same events. It was a scam. From Huffington Post:

After a while, you learn what works,” a panhandler in Florida named Robert Couch told the Tampa Bay Times. Eugene told me he’d been doing the same thing on the same stretch of road near the Charles River for three decades. Like any business, once you’ve developed a process that works, you should either continue doing it, or improve it.

With a freshly skeptical mind, I have since changed the way I offer my help. Some of these men and women are in desperate need of assistance; others are simply savvy businesspeople taking advantage of the system. From the same article:

You can’t get more tax-favored than panhandling. The U.S. Tax Court has held, ironically, that if you sing or perform in exchange for tips, that’s taxable, but if you just beg for money and give nothing in return, that’s tax-free.

I no longer feel the guilt I felt as a teenager, but I still want to positively impact this demographic of people in need. I know that my greatest gift is nutrition and can feel good about offering up an apple. This offer is one without downside. I never feel taken advantage of. I’m confident that one of two things will happen; either they’ll eat the apple and we will both feel good about the exchange or they won’t eat it and I’ll have tried to help.

Nowadays, with a sharpened intuition, I look for folks who aren’t asking but clearly need a meal. I’ll bring them one. These souls are difficult to miss. There is nothing businesslike about them.

I reckon I won’t ever be as hungry as the dog Jack London mentioned, but my bone is healthy fruit and veggies. I’ll continue to look for ways to share them.

Eyes open,

Kap

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  • Ed H

    It ain’t always easy to be a good citizen. The desire to be one separates you.

    • Gabe Kapler

      You as well, Ed.

  • Chris

    It is a slippery slope. I volunteered at a food pantry over the winter and was happy to help, but did not feel good about the type of food those people in need were getting. While it temporarily satisfied their family’s hunger, it was also filling their bodies with processed foods with chemicals and sugar.

    • Gabe Kapler

      Totally fair take, my friend. The mission is to keep searching, not to have the perfect solution, dig?

      • Ed H

        That might be your best quote to date. Simple but powerful.

        • Tom R

          Great quote. This quote will motivate me today to be a better me.

  • Karl

    Working in NYC you get hit with these decisions every time you walk the city, every block, doesn’t matter the neighborhood. Its such a conflict between wanting to help, not being able to help everyone, and in a matter of seconds trying to assess whether the need is real. I have no answer, but I love your idea and commend you for trying to make a difference. It makes no difference because this post was about trying to make a problem better, but I think the fact that a person with your resources considers and grapples with this is so inspiring. This is why I look forward to this blog every morning. You have officially entered the top 10 people I would like to meet in my lifetime.

    • Gabe Kapler

      Karl, it’s you that inspires me. Thank you.

      Kap

  • https://twitter.com/LVC_CoachSchell USAbaseball22

    Great timing for this topic. I found myself in a similar situation this week. I saw a man, identifying himself as a military vet, asking for money, “anything helps.” He was stationed outside of a mall, so I pulled over and offered him the cash I had on me (not a ton but I figured enough for a couple good meals).
    After he thanked me, I noticed that he pulled his iPhone 5 out of his pocket in a brand new life-proof case and rolled up the cash (along with the rest he must have been given that day - a very large wad of cash).

    Good plan, next time I’ll choose to deliver a nutritious/hearty meal instead

    Love the blog thank you so much.

    • Gabe Kapler

      Thank you for sharing the story and for your support. Immeasurably valuable.

      Kap

  • http://gravatar.com/billstraehl billstraehl

    What you get back is always worth more than what you give up. I was vacationing in the Philippines and liked to go for early morning jogs on the Bay Walk. There were usually a LOT of homeless people, out begging. Very nice and friendly, but always present. On my runs you couldn’t help but notice all the garbage strewn about, detracting from the setting. On my last day, I had a bunch of pesos left that I didn’t need, so I went into the 7-11 (yup!) and bought a box of trash bags. When the kids came around, I handed out the trash bags, and told them if they filled them up with the litter, I’d give them the pesos. I felt good, the park looked so much nicer, and the kids all ran to get ice cream treats.

    • Karl

      Great story, great idea.

    • Gabe Kapler

      Love this, Bill. Thanks for bringing your idea to light.

    • Jake

      Inspired

  • http://www.Kelebekfusion.com kbeyazdancer

    I’m originally from New York City and growing up, I constantly struggled with this. I did not grow up with money or resources (one of 8 kids) and for much of my own childhood I ate at foodbanks and churches to supplement the meals my parents couldn’t pay for themselves. My father always told us to never give money. Offer them food only and that’s what I did. I would offer my own lunch of soup, veggies, and fruit because I know what it’s like to struggle. Sometimes people would take it and be very grateful.
    No one ever knows when they will be in that situation some day, so I was always very sympathetic.

    Thank you for sharing your experience with us Kap! As always, I get a great read out of your blogs during my lunchbreak.
    Thanks love!

    • Gabe Kapler

      Powerful, thank you.

      • http://kbeyazdancer.wordpress.com kbeyazdancer

        Thank you love! This was a very thought provoking and inspiring post.

  • Mike H

    Kap,
    I travel a lot for work. As usual, after a dinner out I have leftovers. I always ask the server for a plastic fork (as sporks are not readily available in restaurants), knife and napkins. When I leave the restaurant I always find someone looking for a handout. I ask them if a hot dinner will work and most say YES! I tell them what the meal is and where it’s from and usually get a big thank you. If they are a vet, I spend a few minutes speaking with them about their past tour of duty and thank them for their service. A warm meal is always welcomed and the leftovers don’t get thrown out. Maybe some of your readers will try this. Cheers!

    • Gabe Kapler

      A) Love the spork drop.
      B) Thanks for leading with such strong behavior.

  • Msquared

    Well written Kap.
    Working in/near San Francisco- it is often that I see folks down on thier luck…. Even full families sitting outside the grocery store waiting for some sort of help is now common….. Thus i often find myself handing out a pizza, hamburger/happy meal or even a Safeway gift card with the *hope* that it will be used on a meal.
    While some may be scamming me, it can be hard to determine the true objective… That said, i feel better about he fact that I tried…. And that somewhere along the way I have fed a person or a family of even for just one meal.

    • Gabe Kapler

      It’s tricky, right? In any event, kudos on trying to make an impact. Your fellow humans are watching.

  • Scott

    Your story was an interesting but weird one. How many meals could the guy eat in one night. What was in it for the kids to spend their time/gas/money pouring water on the guy?

    • Gabe Kapler

      I reckon he wasn’t looking for meals, Scott. Guessing this was a cash play, dig?

      Take care,
      Kap

  • dbreer23

    Polar opposite experiences:

    1. Recently gave a piece of my lunch (Clif bar) to a gent on a street corner (sign in hand) who clearly needed some nutrition. He thanked me and had the look that I just handed him manna from up on high. Scam or not, I felt good in that I ‘thought’ I was helping someone.

    2. A few years ago, encountered a chap (again, sign in hand), with a dog that was clearly in need of nutrients and calories (the chap looked well-fed, however). We had purchased some cat food during that shopping trip and decided to hand over a couple of cans for the sake of the dog - the guy looked at us as if we were crazy. Maybe he didn’t like cats…

    - Dan

    • Gabe Kapler

      The happy stories are just as powerful as the sad. Thanks for bringing it as always.

  • http://gravatar.com/christinehart68 christinehart68

    Nice post! I always felt if I give “them” a buck and they use it for an unsavory purchase I am not out much dough….but a kind heart and a dollar here and there add up quickly when you’re walking in the city. I’m going to buy a bag tomorrow, stay kind but deliver nutrition instead! Peace!

    • Gabe Kapler

      Love it, Christine. Thanks for bringing an open mind.

  • Chris

    A chicken & donut place is teaming up with a community soup kitchen in Philadelphia in an effort to creatively and positively affect this situation here. They’re currently trying to raise money through a Kickstarter. I donated a few days ago. Here’s the link to check out what they’re doing. https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/3806479/radical-hospitalty-and-the-rooster-soup-company/

    • Gabe Kapler

      Quality comment, Chris. Thanks.

  • Duane

    Outstanding post Kap! I really like the bag of apples. You got my mind working. Thank you for all you do and keep the post flowing.

    • Gabe Kapler

      I think you’ll appreciate tomorrow’s guest post, Duane. Thanks, brother.

      • Duane

        Looking forward to guest post! Willing to give a hint?

  • Duane

    Looking forward to tomorrow’s guest. Willing to give a hint?

    • Gabe Kapler

      Sure, former Red Sox prospect, still fighting.

  • Devorama

    Excellent post today. Once again sir, you’ve managed to stir a controversial pot without applying moral overtones.

    You mentioned “taking advantage of the system”, it seems more personal than that to me. They utilize the social systems of our culture in the methods they employ, but in the selection of the words they “fly”, they’re taking advantage of their fellow humans’ proclivity for compassion. It’s probably the subtle recognition of this that fuels the animosity some hold toward the indigent and homeless, I felt that way myself or a time.

    Not unike all fear driven thoughts, my disdain diminished and my.desire to offer assistance to my fellows has reemerged. I’m so glad it did, compassion is too beautifully powerful to be quelled by dishonesty for very long.

  • Jygriff

    I help whenever I can and let God handle the rest……..

  • Tabitha Bemis

    We try to buy them a meal. Living in a small town, we have a few well known charachters. They will gladly take your money to the ABC store, but are always grateful for a hot meal. Most upsetting situation was outside an army post. Soldier in uniform told my son he left his Id on post and was out of gas. It happens. My son gave him $10 of his own money. It was a proud Mom moment. Ran to walmart the next evening with my hubby….same guy, same story. Needless to say, my husband (Army 1SG) had hi in front of his command within the hour. Too many folks in need to use your uniform as a scam. We believe if we do things in the right spirit, it blesses us. If people take it in the wrong spirit, that’s on them.
    On a side note, HuGE increase of folks on the streets with signs, begging for help, in Durham this week. Assuming it will drop off significantly now that All Dtars are over.