If James Bond stops by, I’ll be ready. I now know how to fix his drink.
Y’all have been spending plenty of time with me. We regularly share good food, music, laughter and, once in a while, a stiff drink. I’m pretty loyal to Scotch whisky, neat, when I indulge. I branch out sometimes. An ice cold (almost frozen) beer with a slice of pizza or a burger has been known to sneak it’s way onto my menu, as has a Cab with a steak.
I’ve never been much of a mixed drink man though. Don’t get me wrong, I sampled a Super Socco and gin in my teenage years (thanks, DJ Quik)
I can’t confirm or deny vomiting screwdrivers into a chip bowl at a West Valley party during 1992. Those days were probably responsible for my swearing off mixing liquor with other stuff.
Now, I’m working on further developing my culinary repertoire. Despite the memories of my nausea, I need to understand how to create a cocktail. While I might be happy with a few ounces of Monkey Shoulder, you could show up anytime unannounced. I may pretend I’m not home (I can be quite introverted), but assuming I’m in the mood to chit chat, I’ll have to offer you a drink.
Neither my guests nor I benefit from my pretending like I’m not a rookie. Instead of muddling along (see?), I reached out to my friend Stephanie, who also happens to kick ass on a daily basis editing this blog while simultaneously using her computer skills to win coding battles and teaching us about feeding dogs raw meat and…deep breath…making her own flavored liquor.
I’m aware of this because she sent me this email 7 months ago to plant the seed.
If you ever get into adulterating your alcohol into cocktails, I will send you some of my homemade bitters.
Kind of annoying to be that talented, huh?
Anyhow, I figured I could either enroll in bartending school or just reach out to Steph. The latter seemed monumentally simpler and less time consuming.
I’m thinking of writing a post on the one cocktail everyone must know how to make. What say you?
Easy enough. I put it on a tee for her (only baseball reference in the post, hang with ‘em). I knew she’d come out swinging (last one, promise).
A martini. Not the “vodka, extra dry, wave the bottle of cheap vermouth near it, then put a salad in it” type, but a traditional gin and vermouth martini. Adjust according to your preferences after you learn the basics.
Got it. Gin and vermouth. I was apparently mistaken in my open about Bond. I won’t be learning his version.
“A dry martini,” [Bond] said. “One. In a deep champagne goblet.”
“Oui, monsieur.”
“Just a moment. Three measures of Gordon’s, one of vodka, half a measure of Kina Lillet. Shake it very well until it’s ice-cold, then add a large thin slice of lemon peel. Got it?”
He thought he was cool, but was put in his place by Stephanie. Her commentary on the drink kind of makes him look like a poser, doesn’t it?
Okay then, hipster. What are my steps to “the basics”?
1. Chill your martini glass
2. Fill up your shaker or mixing glass about 1/3 of the way with ice
3. Add 1 1/2 oz. gin, 1 1/2 oz. dry vermouth, and a dash of orange bitters to the shaker
4. Stir (don’t shake). You want to simultaneously dilute and chill your cocktail. Stir it with purpose, but not like you’re trying to beat egg whites. 30 seconds to a minute should be good.
5. Strain into your chilled martini glass.
6. Using a peeler, peel a strip of lemon zest, squeeze the oils out over the cocktail, and drop it in.
Notes: Use good gin. The martini is a cocktail made with gin, not vodka (that’s a kangaroo). I like to use a good London Dry style. It doesn’t have to be super fancy, but get quality stuff. More importantly, use GOOD vermouth. If the only thing you have is a 6 year old bottle of Martini and Rossi, throw it out. Vermouth is fortified wine and will oxidize. Get a fresh bottle, keep it in the fridge after opening it, and don’t expect it to last forever. I usually prefer Dolin, but there are several good ones on the market.
This is your basic cocktail. You can tweak it to your preference (try a different ratio of gin:vermouth, for instance). If you change the gin for whiskey and use sweet vermouth instead of dry, you have a Manhattan.
By the way, the recipe you cite from James Bond is called a Vesper. If you’re ever looking to try a scotch cocktail, the Blood & Sand is my favourite, but generally the Monkey Shoulder takes bitters tremendously well, giving you essentially a ton of variations on a theme.
Two things:
- I’ll reiterate, Bond orders a dry martini, not a Vesper. So that’s his mistake, not mine (cleverly shifts responsibility).
- Told you she’s a hipster. Who writes favourite? From grammarist.com:
Favorite and favourite are different spellings of the same word. Favorite is the preferred spelling in the U.S., while favourite is preferred in all the other main varieties of English.
You live in Maryland, Steph. I’m going to double check my globe.
Kap
MIchelle says
Hopefully when I show up unannounced, you’ll be in a chatty mood. Another good one. Cheers
Gabe Kapler says
I’ll be chattier if you bring coffee. Love having you show up here regularly, Michelle. Thanks.
Eddie Rivas says
Try it with Martin Miller’s Gin. It is a perfect gin for this drink.
Stephanie St Amour (@sstamour) says
I’ll check that one out, Eddie. Thanks!
Gabe Kapler says
I’ll have to run that one by Stephanie for approval, Eddie. Don’t want to piss her off. She could embarrass me like she did Bond.
Joel Sproul says
Looking for forward to showing up unannounced someday.
How does the Monkey Shoulder compare with a good Oban or Glen Morangie (neat, of course)? I may have to find some for a taste. I’m a fan of Hendricks or Bombay Saphire for the martini – and less vermouth. A good sipping tequila is another thing you should have in your cupboard. There should be plenty to choose from in SoCal.
Gabe Kapler says
Tequila. Noted. Thanks, Joel.
Duane says
Damn fine post Steph…I mean Kap. I usually don’t drink during the week but you have me tempted however i think i will save for the weekend. Thanks as always Kap for the education of food, exercise, smoke detectors and drinks. Peace.
Stephanie St Amour (@sstamour) says
Let me know how it goes!
Duane says
will do. Thanks for all you do.
Gabe Kapler says
Steph, Duane has been here everyday for like….I don’t know how long. My man is consistent. So glad to have him in the family.
Stephanie St Amour (@sstamour) says
Indeed. It makes all the work worth it.
Duane says
I was going over the “hipster” steps and notice step 3 had the orange bitters as a link but it seems that the link is not working.
Stephanie St Amour (@sstamour) says
Thanks Duane, fixed.
Duane says
Thank you.
Msquared says
Not sure if you or Steph have ever heard about the wonders of using vodka (aka- a non-toxic way) to clean …(counter tops, windows, linens… Etc…)
Would make a great post….
I have been researching the negative effects (ie-cancer) of household cleaning supplies and detergents…. Some pretty scary and thought provoking info.
Stephanie St Amour (@sstamour) says
Vodka does do a pretty good job at deodorizing, and it is a natural antiseptic, so I could see it working. I haven’t tried it on much yet. Sounds like I need to do some reading!
Gabe Kapler says
I think I’ll have some fun with this one.
Msquared says
I forsee a lot of “see-what-I-did-there?’s”…
Looking forward to the added perspective.
donnalovebees says
Steph, you know I adore you. This is the best story so far. ps: Plymouth Gin is the most perfect gin ever.
Stephanie St Amour (@sstamour) says
Plymouth is delicious. You never fail to make me smile, Donna. Thanks.