A message to wait staff everywhere: when a customer asks for help with a meal order, be decisive.
Recently, I strolled into a new Indian restaurant in Phoenix. The food was strong, the service was attentive and the experience was enjoyable…sans a two minute stretch in which the woman serving my table struggled to make a recommendation. She didn’t want to be on the hook.
Her: They’re both great (big smile splashed across her face)
Okay, not what I love to hear, but I’d been here (in life) countless times before. I knew how to get her there.
The outcome of this experiment was excellent. I crushed a variety of flavors, spices and textures. But as much as I want it to be, this post isn’t about Indian food. It’s about how to be an expert.
When I walk into an accountant’s office, I don’t want him to give me choices. I went to Moorpark Community College, and I am still as far from a degree as I was the day I enrolled. My C in Latin American History isn’t going to help me decide how many dependents to claim. I want him to decide, and that’s why I want to work with him.
Okay, so maybe math and numbers aren’t analogous with food. Maybe design works better.
A friend of mine helped me decorate my bedroom. She asked some questions to help guide her decisions, then she took the fuck over. She called the shots, she never wavered, and she never said “option A or option B?” She designs bedrooms, I run sprints. When she wants a workout program, I won’t say, “do you want to do yoga or lift weights?” I’ll just make the decision that I believe makes the most sense.
When I enter a restaurant, I usually want the expert to choose. I establish that I have an experienced, very adventurous palate. “I eat everything, please have the chef prepare what he/she kicks ass at.”We, as human beings, respond to those with authority. Some of this is social conditioning – our lives begin by following directions from our parents and other adults as we navigate through our early years. But more importantly, it boils down to efficiency. Life is filled with moments in which we need to make good decisions, often quickly. I don’t have all the necessary information at my fingertips, so I want to work with someone that does. From a 2013 study by Deck and Jahedi:
The effect of cognitive load on economic decision making is that people tend to become increasingly risk averse under conditions of high cognitive load.
Collectively, these results suggest that choosers may experience frustration with complex choice-making processes.Also, that dissatisfaction with their choices – stemming from greater feelings of responsibility for the choices they make, may lead to a lower willingness to commit to one choice.
The more choosers perceive their choice-making task to necessitate expert information, the more they may be inclined not to choose at all.
That was definitely not the case for me and food. But it might be when my familiarity is weaker.
We cannot be experts in everything, and it would be foolish to try. But in the cases where you are the novice, seek out the expert. And when you’re the exert, make a decisive recommendation. You’ll be respected and appreciated as a result.
This reminds me of my professor in college. (BA from UTA) he told us “Hire people smarter than you. You will look smarter and have your business run more efficiently. “
Be decisive on Super Tuesday
Vote Trump
Make America great again
I would say you’re in the wrong here. She gave you the answer you asked for and you responded by ordering both, thus negating your even asking her.
You may want the expert to ultimately be the assertive “decider,” but why should restaurants even have menus if you and others don’t want options.
Also, not knowing how many dependents you have seems worrisome.
I agree that experts are experts for a reason but you cannot – well perhaps you should not – go through life without some very basic knowledge of numerous things – like how many children you can claim on your tax filing.
On a side note, boy will I be glad when “crushed it” falls out of favor with the Millenials.
Swing and a miss Brian. I’m not sure if you’ve read much of Kap’s great stuff but a lot of the time he’s simply drawing a comparison to make a larger point. If you take everything literally you’ll strike out every time and never ever “crush it”.
Chris, your response seems to be inconsistent with what I wrote. In this case, I should have taken what he wrote literally as he was upset with someone not giving him a definitive answer and then negating it by ordering both of the dishes he asked for.
And seriously, how can anyone not know how many dependents they have?
I think you are confusing literal with analogous.
I don’t take everything literally; I am much too adept at reading complex issues to do that.
I do not want to ever crush it, showing that you missed every point that I missed in my response.
Naaah. Not really. In this case Brian is right on the mark. I’m sure your swooning is appreciated by someone though.
Heard a suggestion once that made sense depending….When you go into a nice restaurant, instead of asking the server what they recommend, simply ask them what did the chef have for dinner? Problems could arise though, if the chef is secretly trying to get RID of a dish that isn’t moving!
Brian might want to switch to yoga and some anger management
No no no! Ah, dang it!
What within my response was written or could be read as having any anger whatsoever?
I do yoga and I am far from an angry individual.
Very confused as to how you could read my response that way.
Hey Kap, I’d be interested in knowing which restaurant you went to in Phoenix, as we have a few good one’s here. If you ever get a chance to visit Scottsdale, you should try Mint Indian Cuisine as well.
Ugh. So sick of people trying to school others on what they think is proper service. As a long time server and bartender, 34 years to be exact, just stop. Any long term server knows what I’m talking about. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve suggested a dish when asked just to have the customer not like it. The server, in this example, sounds like she was being careful because I’m sure this has happened to her too. When someone is stuck between two dishes, I will say something like “Are you feeling something with marinara or something asian inspired? Two different things and it just depends on what taste you’re feeling today”. I let them make the decision though because I got tired of being blamed for suggesting it. This guy doesn’t know what he’s talking about. It’s food, there is no “expert” when it comes to what a person will like or not like.
That’s close to the point I was attempting to make. Looks like you escaped being ridiculed for it, however.
The internet is full of assholes. I don’t listen to them, especially when I’m right and they’re not, some people can’t handle it. We were right in this case. This guy sounds like a pompous ass that was most likely this poor server’s worst customer. Ugh.
can never be decisive when it comes to food, especially good food so I always order as much as I could 🙂 … ready for lamb saag anytime … the quinoa salad and the lentil soup looks good too 🙂
I’m an economics major, and there’s this running joke in economics that “choices are bad.” Here’s a link to a book that argues removing consumer choices reduces customers’ anxiety.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Paradox_of_Choice
I’d also like to note that it can be fun to ask a waiter or waitress what their favorite entree on the menu is, and just order that. No time spent thinking about what to order, more time spent talking to people at your table, and you will probably get to try something new that you wouldn’t normally order.
I admit, I’m having a hard time to be decisive when it comes to food. LOL! If I am with my friends and they ask me what I like, I’ll just say “anything”. By the way, problems like this arise any where. I’ve experienced the same when I was traveling to other country.