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Baseball is Life: On Weight Loss and Process

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I know I said I’d address open thread questions on Saturdays, and I will. However, there are no rules to this blog, and a question came up that inspired me.

Char says:

Gabe, can you give me a word of encouragement? I’m trying to lose 25 pounds and get back in (reasonable) shape. I lost 9-10 pounds with workouts and avoiding sweets/alcohol, but the last couple of weeks I seem to have plateaued. It’s depressing. Any boost you can give me would be much appreciated.

You’re misguidedly trying to lose weight, huh? It’s been a while and it seems a refresher is in order. From my January post on scales and deciding not to weigh yourself:

Your scale is like your worst ex. It’s a liar; deceitful, manipulative and behaviorally inconsistent. It’s most dangerous characteristic? It’s intoxicating, luring you in day after day with the promise of better things to come.

Char, I encourage folks to gauge their lifestyle progress by how they feel rather than how much they weigh. There are so many variables when it comes to the number the scale says. How much muscle mass we carry, our current water weight, when we weigh ourselves, what we wear when we do…all of these factors play a role in what number shows up.

Look, I’m certainly not discounting the value of dropping a few pounds as the catalyst for some warm fuzzies. I’m thrilled that you nailed that 9-10 pound loss early on if that was your mission. But I wasn’t inspired to address this question because of a weight loss discussion. My counsel for you, and for everyone, is not about pounds.

Focusing on process rather than outcome ultimately results in the greatest lifestyle improvements. Simultaneously, it keeps us present and confident. We have little control over outcomes, but nearly complete control of our moment-to-moment actions.

In baseball, being in a “slump” sucks. Players in an 0-for-20 skid sometimes try to break it by going 20 for their next 10, even as we know how detrimental that is. Truthfully, “trying” to get even a single hit is useless. Instead, we focus on how we approach each individual at-bat. We learn a pitcher’s tendencies and our own. We deconstruct our previous failures and apply those lessons prior to ever walking up to the dish. This preparation and understanding is where the real value and long term upside lies. By controlling the process, the results will come.

Baseball, ultimately, is a metaphor for life. Life, and in this case, nutrition, is simply a series of at bats. If we center our attention on making ideal choices in our eating habits and focus on making correct decisions in the moment, our clothes will fit more comfortably. We will notice we move more gracefully. Our joints and tendons will ache less.

I endorse celebrating your accomplishments and then moving on to your controllable behavior. You mentioned that you’ve avoided sweets and alcohol. Have you taken a moment to really appreciate that accomplishment or are you trying to hit a five run home run?

Positive long-term outcomes are the result of splendid processes. Set your sights, Char, on setting up systems which impact your ability to be successful for the rest of your life, rather than what the scale says tomorrow.

Dig that,

Kap

  • Janinne

    I commented here recently about this. “Trust the process” is something I have to keep in mind all the time. Have faith in it and in you. Be forgiving and gentler with yourself when you stumble. Just keep moving forward. Tony Robbins teaches us that it’s not the goal, it’s who you become in its pursuit. I’m rooting for you, Char.

  • http://kbeyazdancer.wordpress.com kbeyazdancer

    I dig very much! Got rid of my scale years ago because that thing made me crazy. I support Char in moving forward with being healthy, which is why I commented. I dislike labels and magazines that tell me how much I should weigh in order to be sexy. I don’t need them to tell me that. I already know 1-I love my curves, 2-being stronger made me a better dancer, and 3-I lowered my cholesterol without the use of medication just by getting my weight in check and eating better.
    For me, that is success.
    Have a good Sunday love!
    Kelebek

  • Chris

    Focusing on the process works for just about any facet of our lives as humans. School work, career, relationships, most any sport(from golf to baseball to marathon running), even something as simple as driving to work and especially a lifestyle change all must have a followed process. It’s easy to try to “think ahead” but most often when we do, we forget a key step in the process to get there.

  • Char

    Well!

    Other than being gobsmacked that my comment inspired you :-) - I’ll try to expand a bit.

    Of course it’s not simply about numbers on a scale. It is indeed about how you feel, and as a woman of relatively advanced age *cough* I can attest that carrying around an extra 15-20 pounds on a small frame feels HORRIBLE.

    I certainly appreciate what I have accomplished, but therein lies a trap. My “fat” clothes are looser, I watched the needle on the scale slip below the 140 mark, and I think, hey, I can have that beer with a burger, and two days later, zing! I’m back over 140! And I didn’t need the scale to tell me - I knew it.

    It’s discouraging is all. It seems you work so hard and so long (those 10 pounds took me months to shed), and one little bobble knocks you backwards.

    Nothing to do but get back at it, though, is there? Having the scale register lower isn’t my goal. The scale is just a signpost, pointing TO my goal. I want to wear my jeans. I want to slip easily into my favorite jacket. I want to be able to look at myself in a mirror. Above all, I want to FEEL better.

    I’ll think of you, Gabe, and all the nice commenters here, and that will help. Thank you everyone, and good health to all. :-)

  • http://Twitter.com/athleticone01 Michelle

    I try to turn it around with people and ask them if the scale says you dropped 10 pounds but you still didn’t feel good about yourself and your clothes felt the same, would you really be happier because of a number…

    “Food” for thought. Keep up the dedication.

  • http://gravatar.com/slappythefishman slappythefishman

    Here is the thing about weight loss.

    There is no denying that being at the right weight is important but that should not be measured by solely a scale, better measures are blood pressure, cholesterol, blood oxygen levels creatinine, body fat ect.

    The reason why this message is lost is because there is a current social narrative about not fitting into an aesthetically pleasing form. What is even more upsetting is that those who promote this narrative deemed that those who do not meet this standard are somehow the moral inferior of those who do. They are immediately classified as lazy, lack self-control, dumb or disgusting. What other group of people get this type of treatment. We think we can say anything about or to them, when what is really needed is a little compassion and acceptance.

    I can on about this for a long time but the bottom line is, if you want to exercise and change your diet, that is awesome and good for you but maybe rather than picking arbitrary number revisit your motivation. Maybe being healthy, living longer with a better quality of life is more important that fitting into a pair of pants. The human body is an amazing creation, if you eat right and exercise your body will find the right weight for you. Find your inspiration from the fact you love yourself and you are doing this to make yourself a better person and to better serve the ones who love you.

    • http://gravatar.com/pwsummerville Peter Summerville

      Slappythefishman,

      That is a great take on this topic, thank you for sharing that with us.

      Hope your having a nice Sunday!

      -Peter

    • Char

      OK, to re-reiterate…

      I’ve been around for a few years, had weight gains and losses, been through pregnancy and surgery, and I know my body pretty well by now.

      A number on a scale or fitting into my clothes aren’t the ultimate ambition - feeling better is. However, those markers are tangible rewards that give me something to grasp, something to aim for. Yes, I love myself, but I also love not wearing “fat” clothes!

      And as I said, after a few decades, I know what my optimim weight/fitness level should be. I’ve been told in the past I should weigh 115 pounds, which IMHO is insane; I fell to that weight some years ago after surgery and looked/felt cadaverous. I am aiming for 125 (122 would be ideal, but I’m not killing myself to get there), which means I have 15 pounds to shed. That is not an arbitrary number by any stretch. It’s a goal, and perhaps it makes me a lesser person, but to accomplish anything, a goal is what I need.

  • http://twitter.com/Matt1J Matt (@Matt1J)

    In my psychology class, we are learning that you think about what you think about. It’s funny but it’s true. You really do need to get rid of negative thinking if you want to accomplish something positive. So instead of thinking “I stopped eating sugar and drinking alcohol and I only lost 9-10 lbs.”, it’s better to think “I feel healthier since I stopped eating sugar and drinking alcohol.” You are basically saying the same thing, but one is in a negative way and the other is in a positive way.

    • Hollie Hamilton

      Hey Matt, is your psych class talking about Mindset, I loved that book.

  • Zach

    Hey Kap, have a diet question. I’m all aboard the “fat doesn’t make you fat, sugar does” train, and I’ve been working more and more high-quality meats into my diet. As a burger lover (who isn’t), where does that fit into the equation? If the meat is high-quality, that’s good, but where does a burger fall off the nutritional ledge, so to speak? Is it the bun and processed cheese?

  • https://www.facebook.com/matt.dorsey.35 Matt Dorsey

    Most people say I am lucky because I am 42 and have been about the same weight my entire adult life, anywhere from 180-190 lbs. However, despite the fact that I weigh myself all the time, I just do it out of habit and curiosity, I am all about how I look and feel when it comes to my fitness. I have been 180 lbs and in lousy shape and I have been 190 and felt and looked great.